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Tomorrow Is Nearly Yesterday And Everyday Is Stupid

by Crywank

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1.
Memento Mori 02:47
Everyone I love is going to die, and I will die as well. I think about this before I sleep, and have since I was a child. In my life will I make a difference? In my death will I be missed? Will I be granted some sort of an afterlife, or will I just cease to exist? This fear makes me feel so naive, I wish that I could just accept, but I'm chilled by the redundancy of thoughts collected, but not kept. Maybe I'm still a stupid little boy, too weak to understand what will come. I want to find peace of mind, maybe no mind is the answer to that condundrum. Oh I want to be a baby again. Oh I want pure thoughts in my head. Oh I want to be a baby again. Oh I want to forget.
2.
This makes me feel like a weak man who thinks that he is strong. Must I play the chauvanist to be the man you want? Sweaty fingers push down on your throat, you say you like it rough, but it's hard to think I do this out of love. And from my own submissive pleasure I want to do just as you wish, but I slap your face too lightly when you ask me to make fists. Kiss me softly do not bite, we can explore like naughty kids. You say you're bored, want dominating, and I just stare and flinch. How rude of me to bring my thoughts into your bedroom. Is it condescending to be so scared I might hurt you.
3.
The way I cast a net Too many holes to swim through As to not offend the fish Even if they do want you Safer not to presume Safer still to up and leave the room Is even eye contact rude? You'll never know that I noticed you. Too gutless to even try this Incase I'm met with a hostile silence If I were you I'd be throwing up.
4.
Notches 03:18
Noone to wonder when I'll be home One more night stoned alone Ever-increasing notches on my belt I want to feel more than just sorry for myself I still feel stupid when I cry. I need to try... to find a way to fix my head and not be so damn self-obsessed to learn to like to be myself and not rely on someone else to care not for fears and not for doubts and just for those i care about to try because I want to try and not to try for only I I wait for something to change maybe what should change is really me now I can see why I was cast aside you'll all have a better love, you'll all have a better life watch me spread my wings just to fall down watch me waiting here, flat-faced little clown
5.
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7.
8.
Hive mind is scary I feel vulnerable and stupid Waiting for a new embaressment to go and tear right through me A dependent fruitless animal, watch me brimming with shame. And this confidence I fake only makes matters worse. I am not a stallion, I am just perverse. Hopeless, and docile, and tamed. Another day I won't remember, another day I wished away. Tedious days punctuated by dismay, everyday feels the same. It's the routine, It's the regret. That makes me worse yet. Did I forget your name or make a joke and no-one laughed? Did I come across as stupid or did I cum too fast? This isn't a brave face, this is a mask. Now I remember it doesn't take much to make me feel small.
9.
Enthusiastic beyond belief In a busy room you're all I see I fear this admiration will be the end of me blurring the lines between what I want and what I need Calm down, don't let her see how fast your heart is beating Calm down, control your breathing. and if you don't want me, well thats just tough luck. I think about you but I know I'm not good enough. Have I built you up too much? Now I can't say whats on my mind incase I go and scare you away. All the people you meet will have thoughts optimistic and sweet and how can I compete with the world at your feet. Would it be cruel to let my eyes return to you? Would it be cruel to give my thoughts to you? Feelings for friends turn to hate when i see what they are willing to throw away now I envy a fool who only negates anything with a deeper meaning he trys to say. I wouldn't want to hurt you by letting you hurt me you don't deserve to feel guilty I'm an overly sensitive impatient little freak you'd do better to turn your back on me why do I think these stupid thoughts? I want to fight my own advice. For I will only feel remorse. I just want you in my life.
10.
Stacked up to my height turn and see you cry. Crumpled down to my size broken by your fathers vice. Those years you don't remember I spent crumpling leather. In the seat next to where you drive where you gave your best advice. Your favourite song line hurts I didn't understand it at first but an empty seat on your ride home reminds me how often you are alone
11.
Waste 01:07
12.
13.
Hand and Knees. Scrubbing dirt from the mens room floor. The automatic urinal flush comes on and I get sprayed in the face. New thoughtful ways to degrade. Wheezing and eyes glazed I bunk off in a fog of human residue to write poetry about how much I hate my job. "Do you have PPE for self-esteem"?
14.
Could you be the one who drives me to be better? Helps me realize my dream of being a sophisticated begger. I'm going to get older faster than I think. I'l need an arm to link with when I limp. If I go my way, I'll have lonely days, and only one they say will have me saved. Will you be there when I need someone to hold? Will you make sure I'm not lonely when I'm old? And I will hope that you will always adore me. And I will hope that you don't die before me. What foolish requests, to expect of someone to be more than second best. There's no wonder why we're left in this confusion, when the culture it feeds us romantic delusions.
15.
Leech Boy 04:03
16.
I Am Shit 02:06

about

Reviews of TINYAEDIS
"James began from an unknown bedroom recording acoustic artist to one of the most iconic and prominent figures in the “sad core” scene. James’ sound has emerged in every way that is expected as an artist’s discography expands." lastonourlist.com 5/5

"It takes the depressing aspects of the previous two albums, and completely goes for that third strike. Clayton's self-loathing attitude is still there, with his lyricism taking a huge leap forward in terms of flow, ambiguity, and intellect." musicreviewdatabase.co.uk

"Crywank have refined their emo-tinged, folk-punk-esque, singer-songwriter style to an exact science... James’s realistic approach to lyricism transcends the “emo-revival” and solidifies Crywank as the folk artist to watch in 2014." Full Frequency Collective

"an absolute fucking wallowfest of self-depreciating pity that renders the album unlistenable" - thepanoptic.co.uk

credits

released November 7, 2013

James Clayton - Guitar, Dulcimer, Vocals
Dan 'The Snail' Watson - Percussion, Backing Vocals
Cool guitar bit at the end of Notches by Tom Connolly
Recorded by Joe 'No Relation' Clayton
www.nostudio.co.uk

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Crywank Manchester, UK

Crywank are a UK based anti-folk band. They formed in Manchester. Jay is from Barnsley, Dan is from Darwen. They mostly write sad songs and have been told they are the worst named band in the country.

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